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We've been friends for so long, I can't remember which one of us is the bad influence.
The dentist said I needed a crown. (crown image) I was like I know, right?!
I'm not saying I am Wonder Woman. I am just saying that no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman in the same room.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I ever wanted in a friend.
We are only as strong as the girlfriends we have.
One glass of wine away from telling everyone what I really think.
OMG, My mother was right about everything.
I'm not bossy. I just know what you should be doing.
I'm going to be the life of the party (as long as it all ends by 8:30 pm)
Life without dogs. I don't think so. (dog image)
How do I like my eggs? Umm, in a cake.
They say God only gives you what you can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a badass.
When a woman says "Do whatever you want" Do NOT do whatever you want.
I'm having fruit salad for dinner. Well, it's mostly grapes actually. Ok, all grapes. Fermented grapes. I'm having wine for diner.
I love that you're my mom.
Your crazy is showing. You might want to tuck that back in.
I won't be remembered as a woman who kept her mouth shut. I'm OK with that.
Everyone thinks that a girl's dream is to find the perfect guy. PLEASE... Every girl's dream is to eat without getting fat.
I never said I would die without coffee. I said other people would.
You're ridiculous. And by that I mean we'll always be friends.
In this house, we play fetch, go for walks, clean up messes, accept bad breath, get wet kisses, give belly rubs, go for rides, & love dogs.
I live in a madhouse ruled by a tiny army that I made myself.
I'm dreaming of a white Christmas, but if it runs out, I'll drink the red.
Oh what a beautiful day
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