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The dentist said I needed a crown. (crown image) I was like I know, right?!
I'm not saying I am Wonder Woman. I am just saying that no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman in the same room.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I ever wanted in a friend.
We've been friends for so long, I can't remember which one of us is the bad influence.
One glass of wine away from telling everyone what I really think.
OMG, My mother was right about everything.
I'm not bossy. I just know what you should be doing.
I do not have ducks. Or a row. I have squirrels, and they're everywhere.6"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
Your crazy is showing. You might want to tuck that back in.
I'm having fruit salad for dinner. Well, it's mostly grapes actually. Ok, all grapes. Fermented grapes. I'm having wine for diner.
Move over the dog sits here Pillow Cover
When a woman says "Do whatever you want" Do NOT do whatever you want.
I live in a madhouse ruled by a tiny army that I made myself.
How do I like my eggs? Umm, in a cake.
You're ridiculous. And by that I mean we'll always be friends.
They say God only gives you what you can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a badass.
I love you a bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck.
Wash your hands and say your prayers, because Jesus and germs are everywhere
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