Food & Drink Towels

Any friend of coffee is a friend of mine.

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Anyone else feel like they’ve cooked dinner 795 times this month?

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Apparently, “alcohol” is not an appropriate answer to “What motivates you?”

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Bacon (noun) The reason I am not a vegetarian.

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Bloody Mary recipe

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Calorie (noun) A tiny creature that lives in your closet and sews your clothes a little tighter every night.

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Coffee Chocolate Men. Some things are just better rich.

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Come here you giant cup of beautiful coffee and lie to me about how much we are going to get done today.

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Diet Soda (noun) A drink you buy to go with a double cheeseburger and fires.

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Dieting is hard. I left off the spinkles on my cupcake today. (cupcake image)

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Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic.

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Eating (verb) When there is nothing else to do.

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Everyone thinks that a girl’s dream is to find the perfect guy. PLEASE… Every girl’s dream is to eat without getting fat.

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For Christmas, I’ll be having my favorite drink. It’s called “a lot.”

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For the third time this week, I’m buying booze for the next two weeks

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Gimme some sugar / Natural Kitchen Towel

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Good friends offer advice and wisdom. *Best friends come over unannounced with vodka, super-hero costumes, glitter, fireworks, and bacon.

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Good news. Holiday calories don’t count.

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Grocery List (noun) Document you spend time writing but forget to bring to the store.

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